Love of Violence
his father's love could only be expressed through violence and acts of retribution like if an adult did or said something disrespectful to his son the father would tell him and sometimes show him by threat or real violence how things involving his boy got solved his father always said "i'll stick up for you even if it costs me getting my ass kicked." since violence against the father didn't bother him much since it had happened before severely in a street fight landing his father in the hospital years before the son was born so his father now knew he could live through and come out with the flying colors of honor and courage any degree of beating he might receive one night the boy and his father they were out playing basketball on a court beside a gravel lot some teens drove down under the flood lights doing donuts in the gravel before parking and piling out to play in their fucking around they'd scatter shot the father's car with the gravel so the father took his son loaded him in their car and left they went home the father saying "go inside. i'll be back." the boy knowing from the look on his father's face then and when they'd sprayed the car with gravel what was about to happen his father came back unscathed explaining "i went back down there. spit gravel all over their cars too. then got out and stood there and waited." the boy asked "what happened?" his father explained "there were 4 of 'em. but i didn't care. there were 4 of 'em. but they didn't do anything." from scenes such as this and the many that followed the boy grew up to understand that love expressed only through violent defense wasn't much more than standing up for that old copper bubbled and rusty wheel welled ford pinto that got sprayed by a bunch of teens with gravel the boy over time came to understand he was loved as a defense of property of honor or some other abstract principle but never for the thing in and of itself that he was
mrobins71 